Snowy Days

Yesterday there was a snowfall warning. Over 20 cm of snow came falling down. I love fresh snow. It's so pure and white. Magical. You can stomp through it, dig in it, eat it, sled on it. The options are endless. But most importantly you have to enjoy it because it can be gone in no time.

 

Asking For Help

I don't like asking for help. It's not because I don't need it or don't want it. I do, especially these days. No, I don't like asking for help because I know that people are busy and I feel bad asking them to do more. Also, sometimes asking for help makes me feel insecure because I feel like I am admitting that I can't do it on my own while thinking that I should be able to.

It's silly that I have such difficulty asking for help. After all, we are called to love one another and one way to do that is to serve one another. That's what the corporal work of mercy are about, showing charity to each other by feeding, giving drink, clothing, sheltering, visiting and burying (the dead). The thing I'm realizing is, how can we serve each other if we don't know each others' needs? We are increasingly isolating ourselves, and the result is so many of us feel alone and abandoned. So while I don't like asking for help I know it's something I need to do more often. Not just for myself, but for those around me. I also need to ask others if they need help, and help in whatever ways I can. By being more open about our needs it allows us the chance to serve each other which may result in a deepening of friendship and love for each other.

Over the last year I have been discovering some things about asking for help.

Be humble. Admit you need help when you do. I have been surprised by how eager others are to help you when you ask.

Be specific. If I make a general call for help, I've notice that people get overwhelmed and don't know what to do. Fair enough. Do I need someone to watch the little ones for an hour or someone to help me shovel the drive way? It helps to be specific and it makes people see more clearly how to help out.

Be grateful and generous. Nobody likes feeling taken advantage of. Showing gratitude openly and generously is important. Perhaps share some freshly baked goods, a jar of homemade jam or an offer to return the favour in the future.

Do you find asking for help challenging? What are some things you've discovered about asking for help? Howe about offering help?

Seven Quick Takes (no. 9)

--- 1 ---

This week I spent most of my time in pajama pants. Nothing else seems comfortable enough to wear. I know that I'm getting close to the end when my maternity shirts are getting too small and a bras seems like an instrument of torture. Since I don't want to be seen wearing pajama pants, my husband's shirt and no bra in public I opted to keep outings to a minimum this week.

--- 2 ---

Recently I met a lovely Slovakian lady that makes her own sausages, ham, and bacon from a live pig that she buys and butchers herself. We get our pork from a local farmer/butcher but I'm always curious about the butchering process. How much of the pig is used and how much is wasted? I just started reading Odd Bits and have become fascinated by all the odd bits of animals that can be eaten but that we never see in the supermarket. Things like check, tongue, tails, ears and yes even brain. From the sounds of it, this Slovakian lady that I met uses up most of her pig and that's something I'd like to learn how to do.

--- 3 ---

It's been a while since I've mentioned the rabbits. We still have our original four rabbits plus two more does (females). This last year we butchered and froze about forty or so rabbits. Not bad, but I still feel like there is a lot to learn. We've found that four does and two bucks is a good place to be for our rabbitry. Eventually, as our family grown we might expand or start raising chickens too.

--- 4 ---

Going to the library is a great way to find new favorite books. A few of Monkey's (4) favorites right now are The Pirate Cruncher by Johnny Duddle, The Jewel Fish of Karnak by Graeme Base, and 365 Penguins. Sweetpea (almost 2) is obsessed with anything Sandra Boynton, especially the Going to Bed Book.

--- 5 ---

Meals around here have been very simple. Even though I make a weekly menu I have been finding it difficult to find the motivation to make even the simplest of things these days. It makes me sad actually since I do enjoy cooking for my family. We have been enjoying lots of smoothies though.

--- 6 ---

After watching a bunch of documentaries on Netflix I've moved on to Bollywood shows. There are a few that are fun to watch like Aisha, Rab Ne Bana Di Jodi, Di Bole Hadippa!, and Band Baaja Baaraat. Some of them are long but the singing and dancing interspersed throughout make for good knitting background music.

--- 7 ---

Tomorrow we are going to celebrate the French winter festival. I can't wait to eat lots of tire sur la neige (toffee on snow).

Monkey insists on giving me pirate looks as soon as I take out the camera.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Home Birth without a Husband

For the next month, the last month of my pregnancy, my husband will be working out of town. Now out of town is only an hour in a half away, but when your last labour clocks in at 2 hours and 15 minutes it seems like a long ways away. When he told me about this development, which he has actually known about for a while and thought I knew about it to (clearly I need to become telepathic), I remembered that I was in my third trimester and acted accordingly. This means I turned off my ability to think logically and wailed and protested. I felt angry and abandoned and had vivid images of having a baby by myself in some cold and deserted place.

It would appear that I like to know how things will unfold. But control and labour are such an oxymoron that it drives me crazy. So will my husband be at my upcoming labour? I hope so, probably, but I'm preparing myself for the possibility of him not being there. I have two fabulous midwives and a lovely doula so this gives me some peace. Now I need to relax, let go and trust that things will work out in the end.

Child Friendly Nesting Dolls

For Christmas Sweetpea was given a set of plastic nesting monkeys. She enjoys playing with them a lot.

There are few downsides to these nesting monkeys though. For one, the're plastic. I have issues with plastic. Yes, it's everywhere and that's part of the problem. I try to limit plastic toys in our home, especially cheap plastic toys that will break the moment Monkey looks at it.

The other strange thing about the nesting monkeys is the paint. When Sweetpea took them out of the box we all enjoyed the different faces on each monkey. They're so cute. A few days later I noticed the paint was starting to come off the monkeys leaving them armless, eyeless, mouthless or completely faceless. It was so disappointing but apparently other people have experienced the same thing. Unfortunately, these monkeys are going to be given away.

I've started looking for a set child-safe wood nesting dolls. Many wood nesting dolls are intended to be decorations so the paint and lacquer on them can be toxic or contain lead. That's not something I want my little ones to be playing with. I did find one online shop The Golden Cockerel that has a couple child-friendly nesting dolls.

Little Matryoshka Doll

Hansel and Gretel Gingerbread House Doll

These were the only two options I could find with their child-friendly stamp. Alternatively, I could buy a set of unpainted wooden nesting dolls and paint them myself. But, I don't think I have the patience for that sort of thing right now. I'm curious if anyone else has come across some non-toxic nesting dolls for children. Please let me know if you have.

Monkey Turns 4!

Last week was busy for our little family. We celebrated birthdays, went to the dentist, saw the midwife and visited with friends. The week ended with a celebration of Monkey's 4th birthday. We invited over friends and family into our little home. The day was perfect for sledding and skating so Hubby met with them at the local park for some fun outside. I stayed home and visited with those that didn't want to go outdoors.

Sweetpea braved the hill all by herself and clearly enjoyed it!

Everyone came back to home for some snacks and cupcakes. Monkey wanted me to make him a cupcake train. The end result was something that looked part train, part caterpillar, but he loved it all the same.

Monkey received some lovely and thought filled gifts from his friends: books, a soccer ball, homemade play dough, pajamas (which Monkey always seems to need), wood building sets and a handmade car roll.

Monkey gave each buddy a candy and crayon roll that I sewed earlier in the week using this handy crayon roll tutorial.

This week we plan on relaxing. In fact I haven't made is out of my pajama pants since Sunday night, of course I have changed into clean pajama pants since then.

Preparing for a Home Birth

My first two little ones were born at the hospital under midwifery care. Having a midwife was a choice I've never regretted. I really encourage all women who are pregnant to look into the possibility of having a midwife attend their birth. When I started seeing my midwife this time around, she asked if I wanted a home birth. My first labour was long and difficult but my second was fast making the ride to the hospital really stressful. Staying at home for this labour and delivery makes sense, as long as no complications arise.

Even though I know that home birth is safe, and that midwives are trained to identify situations that would require a hospital transfer, I've been anxious about the idea. I blame it one my nursing background and my personality. I bought into the system and didn't question it. Check out The Business of Being Born to get more insight into hospital versus home birth. It's available on Netflix.ca.

A few days ago I took one decisive step towards having a home birth. I got Hubby to inflate the water birth tub which a friend lent to me. I wanted to make sure all parts where in working order. When the time comes nearer we'll have it inflated and set up in the living room. Yes, if I'm going to have a home birth there is going to be water involved. Lots of water. There are many benefits to water birth.

And then, I bought home birth supplies from Mama Goddess Birth Shop. My midwife gave my a list of what I needed to have at home when the time comes. It's not a long list. She'll supply most of the medical supply needed. I'm sure it would have been less expensive if I drove around town and picked up the home birth supplies myself. But, with a pregnant belly and two little ones in tow, not to mention the freezing -30C (-22F) temperatures, there just no way I'm willing to run errands to save a few cents. I ended up ordering the Deluxe Home Birth Kit because I needed a hot water bottle.

Now, a lot can happen between now and when baby decides to arrive so it's possible that I might not be able to have a home birth. In the meantime I'll be reading some crunchy childbirth books like Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and Orgasmic Birth: Your Guide to a Safe, Satisfying, and Pleasurable Birth Experience to get myself into the right mindset. I can't believe I'm almost there.

Quick Takes Friday (no. 8)

--- 1 ---

With the craziness that comes with caring for little ones and keeping house, it doesn't take long before I wonder who that stranger is walking through the door at dinner time. Oh right, that would be my husband! What happened to the hours of gazing into each others' eyes and having the time to feel bored?

In the last four years, I've really come to appreciate the importance of date nights. Tonight, we have our fist date night of 2012 and hopefully there will be many more to come. Here is a list of 10 Romantic (Stay-at-Home) Date Night Ideas or check out The Dating Divas for some fun date night ideas.

--- 2 ---

Cheesemaking. I love eating it and I want to learn how to make it. This is one of my goals this year. I have been reading Artisan Cheese Making at Home and Home Dairy. The next step is to order some basic supplies from Glengarry Cheesemaking and then buy a cow. Ok, so maybe not a cow... at least not yet.

--- 3 ---

When did we buy into the idea that every person/family needed to have their own housing? It creates so much waste and overuse of the planet's natural resources. Plus, we become so disconnected from our community and live in isolation. After living in the same home for almost five years, I barely know those neighbors directly beside our home and have no idea who lives two doors down.

--- 4 ---

Yesterday I threw my vacuum hose outside in frustration (we have an internal vacuum cleaner). It's an old house and it refused to turn on yesterday. It wasn't until I pitched it outside did I realize a breaker had tripped and that was why the vacuum wasn't working.

--- 5 ---

A quilting machine or a serger? Or both? I've been sewing quite a bit lately and have been asking myself those questions. Of course the price tag to just one of the machines makes my stomach seize up. A quilting machine would be nice. Something simple but well made. Any suggestions?

--- 6 ---

I have to confess that I have a problem with contemporary Christian music (CCM). Phew, it feels good to say that aloud. My issue is that after a while the music starts to sound the same. It's as if there is a loss of originality and creativity. Now before the onslaught, I will acknowledge that there are are some talented and unique Christian music artists that I love to listen to. Here are a few I enjoy: Audrey Assad (Restless), Future of Forestry (Open Wide), Burlap to Cashmere (Anybody out There)... errr... there are others but I can't remember right now (pregnancy brain).

--- 7 ---

With my third little I am thinking about having a home birth. My labour and delivery with Sweetpea was very fast and I would have appreciated staying home instead of rushing to the hospital only to leave a couple hours later. I need to wrap my mind around home birth and get some supplies but I think it's a good option to consider.

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

Living in the North

A couple days ago something strange happened to me. I was making my way around town and a thought came to me. I like it here. At first, I was disturbed by that thought. For the last couple years, I've wanted to leave this place. To go somewhere with shorter winters and longer summers. To a place where gardening wasn't about of outwitting the cool weather to make your "big" tomatoes grow larger than the size of a grape.

The truth is I grew up in Northern Canada, and have fond memories of living here as a child. As a child I explored the forests and streams, enjoyed the chilly lakes and climbed the rocks and trees that were everywhere. But after highschool, something changed, I felt ready to leave. So, I went South and love the excitement of the big city and the warmer weather.

While at school I married and both Hubby and I realized that we wanted to return to out home town (Hubby grew up in the same place as I) after finishing our degrees so that we could be closer to family and more affordable housing. Coming home was exciting at first. But, then it took us a long time to form a community of friends. And there was the long winters, and the cool summers, something that never seemed to bother as a child. Having little ones seemed to amplify my loneliness and cabin fever because I couldn't up and go as easily as I did before.

So why the sudden shift? I still don't quite know. Maybe it has something to do with my little ones getting older, or the building of new and beautiful friendships. Perhaps I see more clearly the blessing of being close to family. And maybe the winter doesn't seem as bleak when you have skis attached to your feet or you can walk to the park down the street and go skating or sledding. Maybe once again I'm beginning to realize how amazing it is to be surrounded by vast forests and chilly clear lakes. Maybe, it's all that vitamin D I've been taking. Who knows.

The Story of Clutter

Slowly and surely, it sneaks back into it's favorite areas. It conspires to take over and then suddenly it's there in all its glory: clutter.

The problem seems to get worse as the years go by. I have a feeling it has something to do with housing a growing family. Two pairs of skis turns into three pairs and ski sled. Little people clothing is stored in the anticipation that another little one will be using it in the future. Toys accumulate and books exponentiate. The house feels smaller and the temptation to move into a bigger home is real.

There is an undeniable connection between the story of clutter and the story of stuff. Wanting more instead of making do or reusing is counter-cultural. Going against the current of society requires changes in habits, some of which are so difficult to change. Today I was looking at my cluttered spice cabinet. I wondered what my cooking would be like if I only used spices that were locally grown. What would it be like to cook without cumin, bay leaves and curry? It's a scary thought, but one worth considering.

Over the next couple months, I'm planning on doing some early Spring cleaning and decluttering. Once the baby arrives things we'll be in survival mode for a while. I know that there won't be much time or energy for doing much at that point. I'll be trying out listmoz to generate a few lists of things I'd like done around the house.

Documentaries and Knitting

Now that Advent and Christmas have passed by, I'm looking forward to next couple months to get some knitting, sewing and organizing done for before the baby arrives. At 33 weeks pregnant, that gives me about 9 weeks. I tend to have longer pregnancies.

I've discovered that watching documentaries and knitting go wonderfully together. In the last week I've knit my way through Blue Gold: World Water Wars and Tapped which are both available on Netflix.ca. We don't buy bottled water because of the negative impact it has on the environment but I had little awareness as to where the water in the bottles came from. It's shocking to think that bottled water is often municipal tap water taken from communities, resulting in disastrous consequences. It's also frightening to think that only 3% of the world's water is not saltwater and much of it is becoming lost as a result of pollution, hardscaping and over use. We are fortunate in Canada to have a significant amount of freshwater. We rank 3rd, after Brazil and Russia, for our freshwater availability. But, we shouldn't let this fact make us negligent. Freshwater water scarcity is a global reality. Anyways, I recommend watching the documentaries. Blue Gold has a broader scope, so if you only want to watch one I would check that one out.

I've been watching these shows, I've completed a few projects (minus the buttons, which I'm waiting to receive in the mail). I knit a sweet pair of newborn sized Konoko pants from some yarn in my stash and I've started on a project for an upcoming birthdays (it's a secret for now). There are also some soon to arrive babies (besides my own) that have added projects to my ever growing list. I'm loving the fact that it's winter and that I'm getting uncomfortably pregnant. At least I seem to have more time to knit these days.

A New Year and a New Word

Happy New Year! 

A new year has begun. It's time once again to pick a few goals for the upcoming twelve months. Hubby and sat down and discussed a few things we wanted to improve in a variety of areas. We shared our ideas and goals for spiritual growth, exercise, work and money. We reviewed our budget and talked about our little ones.

Last January, I chose a word to inspire my year. The word was cherish. When I began thinking of a word for this year I was surprised that one came to my mind so quickly: embrace.

I like that embrace encompasses a physical, psychological and spiritual aspect. The physical act of embracing is such a meaningful action. It shows affection, compassion, joy, acceptance and understanding without saying a word. This year I want to be more purposeful about embracing those around me, my husband, children, family and friends. I believe it's important to remember that we are physical beings and that a simple embrace can bring such joy and healing to the body and soul.

Embracing also means willingly accepting or gladly receiving. I like to be in control, or think I'm in control, of life. Often this delusion prevents me from being appreciative when things don't go as planned. This year, I want to work on embracing those things that are out of my control with a glad and joyful attitude.

For me the spiritual aspect of embracing means to delve deeper into the mystery of my faith, to open my heart to God's love and to be not afraid.

I'd like to find a way to place this word somewhere in my home as a constant reminder throughout the year. I haven't figured out a way to do this yet, but I'll share whatever it is I come up with.