Sh*t Happens

by Josée

What can I say, sh*t happens. This is the second time in three days. My patience has run out. Those of you that have never dealt with a pooping-maniac-toddler be very happy. It’s a rotten experience and I’m so done with this stage.

But, if this ever happens to you, follow the steps below.

Step 1: Step out of room to scream and cry.

Step 2: Turn on shower.

Step 3: Fill a bucket with hot water and bleach (lots and lots of bleach!)

Step 4: Return to room (hopefully more calm) and discipline toddler (however you do this in your family).

Step 5: Place toddler in shower and scrub. Make sure toddler does not start licking the tub floor (we had this problem – what is he thinking!). If he does stop him because that’s just nasty.

Step 6: Place toddler on potty in front of bedroom door to watch you clean the mess.

Step 7: Do the dirty work and clean the poop off the flour, bedding, wall etc. while conversing with your toddler:

Me: (with frustrated tone) “what is this?”
Monkey: “poop!”
Me: “Where does poop go?”
Monkey: “there! there!”
Me: “Nooooooo, where does it go?”
Monkey: “….”
Me: “poop goes in the potty… where does it go?”
Monkey: “potty”
Me: “right poop goes in the potty!”

Step 8: Shower and put toddler back in room for hopefully a nap (never happened in our case though).

Hopefully you’ll never have to follow this process 🙂

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2 comments

thefirstfouryears June 4, 2010 - 12:22 am

hahaha…that post made me laugh so much. I have much to look forward to 🙂

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Lisa August 17, 2010 - 1:16 am

Oh you poor thing. We put our toddler in disposables at night because he LOVES tugging the velcro tabs to get his cloth diaper off!! I know someone who put their kid in their sleep-sack and zipped it up backwards to prevent this. (Magically, the toddler figured it out anyway.) I am so glad this hasn't happened to me!!!

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